The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed. ― Albert Einstein
Do you know what's the difference between a wife and fiancee? - Only 30 kilograms..
One reason a dog can be such a comfort when you're feeling blue is that he doesn't try to find out why.
You can meet an ideal husband on every corner - said God and created the round Earth
Don't say "I love you", if you don't think so. But if you think so, you should say it often. People forget it quickly.
Any feel of guilt won't help to change, what's happened.
Ballerinas have farts too !!!
If you cook a soup and go to computer, so grab and a spoon. It will remind you, that you are cooking of something.
If a turtle loses his shell, we should treat it like he is naked or homeless ?
Boy : I'm warning you, if you take one step closer, I'm never letting you go.
Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have to read the manual and press the right button.
Teens who did not survive the crisis of adolescence, will undergo it in a much later age.
Love is the most dangerous feeling.
Men as Bluetooth - connect to the next, and when they distance away they are looking for another device. Women as WiFi - see all, but accede to the strongest.
Pasta will always burn to the bottom if you don't steadily mix it.. (steadily!!!!!!)
Everyone seems that the biggest woman's wish is to get an ideal man, this is not true - the only things she wants is to eat without gaining weight.
In order to achieve impressive thing - we must not only act but also dream, not only plan but also believe.
Sometimes we have too little hope from the surrounding, but to them it is enough to have baby-faced and commitment to strive the goal.
Words without thoughts never to heaven go.
Secrets of happiness is not doing what you like, but what you do - do it with love.
Anger will never disappear so long as thoughts of resentment are cherished in the mind. Anger will disappear just as soon as thoughts of resentment are forgotten.
When somebody makes you scared, don't forget that the best defence is attack - scary Frankenstein will be best choice, no matter how funny it could be look like
Don't let your dreams go up in smoke - practice fire safety.
Never get into the child zone if you don't intend spend there for a while.
We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today.
The secret of patience is doing something else in the meanwhile.
Until you attain the right moments in the life.. there could be too late !
Dog is enough clever to do stupid his master commands that get what it wants.
Children are the world's most valuable resource and its best hope for the future.
Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible.
Here's how it seems when a man realizes that there isn't the road back..
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
It is said, that in life are three serious things: to await and not attain, to love and be unloved, to search and not find.. But the hardest thing is attain and lose.
When evil competes with other evil, generally one of them we called a goodness.
Sometimes, when you want better.. everything could end just like tragedy!
If you have a big fear than there is nothing else to do - just knock the chair to your head.
Just practice doesn't let you lost in real situation.. No matter what tools you are using for it
Feng Shui was formulated by Chinese thieves - that in the dark would be easier to orient at outlandish houses.
If women fell down – fool will pass, gentleman will help get up, and really men will lie down beside.
Prejudice: If you spill salt - you will tiff, if sugar - will be peace, and if cocaine - wait for wonderful feelings and fantastic views. If you drop fork - somebody will arrive, if you drop soap - wait for surprise. If a swallow flies low - will be rain, if a cow – you just spilled cocaine. If split mirror - wait for trouble, if split panties rubber - wait for big shame (or little), if condom - its better that mirror will split. If itches nose - you will get drunk, if groin - you should go to doctor, if ass - there will be some adventures.
Here's my recipe for stress management: mix one gorgeous boy with a nice new pair of leather boots, a new cashmere sweater, a long night out, and several drinks. Stir in a very late morning and hot chocolate in bed.
Life was much easier when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits...
Don't tell your problems to people: eighty percent don't care, and the other twenty percent are glad you have them.
Vegetarians don't eat animals. This scoundrels treacherous swallow up their food.
Of all things which I lost, I feel the most sorry for the brain...
If the mountain don't go to Mohammed... Means that grass wasn't exceptional!
Don't cry if you lost your friend. You didn't lose it... It's impracticable... It just wasn't your friend!
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